9 Comments
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Jeff Kinnard's avatar

Take her, our poppet

Tears shed as the cart moves on

Bell, bring out the dead

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Honeygloom's avatar

Unexpected and heartbreaking. Nice take on the prompt! It amazes me how much can be conveyed in such short poems.

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Jeff Kinnard's avatar

Thanks! That's my favorite part about haikus. They say little, but mean much.

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The Chronicler's avatar

🧵

Thread through a needle,

a smile full of pennies,

ashen hill of kings.

Feels like a level up from yesterday!

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Honeygloom's avatar

I’ll say it’s a level up, nice!

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Andrei Atanasov's avatar

Needle in the eye,

As she screams, another in the heart-

Dead mother-in-law.

Hope you’ll forgive the slight breaking of the 5-7-5 formula, but many modern haikus do this😂

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Honeygloom's avatar

Personally, I feel like breaking the form makes it a different kind of poem. But I do understand these things are kind of linked to individual tastes.

At any rate, I like this one! Glad you posted it😁

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Andrei Atanasov's avatar

Thanks! Well, from what I understand, most haiku-ists don’t consider the number of syllables to be essential, just the three lines, the two juxtaposed images/image + context, and the fact that the haiku should encompass a flash of insight.

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Honeygloom's avatar

Oh yeah, you’re 100% right. I’m just a fickle/stubborn beast and apply rules rather contrarily😅.

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