9 Comments
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Jeff Kinnard's avatar

Take her, our poppet

Tears shed as the cart moves on

Bell, bring out the dead

Honeygloom's avatar

Unexpected and heartbreaking. Nice take on the prompt! It amazes me how much can be conveyed in such short poems.

Jeff Kinnard's avatar

Thanks! That's my favorite part about haikus. They say little, but mean much.

The Chronicler's avatar

🧵

Thread through a needle,

a smile full of pennies,

ashen hill of kings.

Feels like a level up from yesterday!

Honeygloom's avatar

I’ll say it’s a level up, nice!

Andrei Atanasov's avatar

Needle in the eye,

As she screams, another in the heart-

Dead mother-in-law.

Hope you’ll forgive the slight breaking of the 5-7-5 formula, but many modern haikus do this😂

Honeygloom's avatar

Personally, I feel like breaking the form makes it a different kind of poem. But I do understand these things are kind of linked to individual tastes.

At any rate, I like this one! Glad you posted it😁

Andrei Atanasov's avatar

Thanks! Well, from what I understand, most haiku-ists don’t consider the number of syllables to be essential, just the three lines, the two juxtaposed images/image + context, and the fact that the haiku should encompass a flash of insight.

Honeygloom's avatar

Oh yeah, you’re 100% right. I’m just a fickle/stubborn beast and apply rules rather contrarily😅.