21 Comments
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David Perlmutter's avatar

You just reminded me of an old chestnut handed down in my dad's family about a guy named Dunderbeck who turns all the animals in his neighborhood into sausages via his machine.

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Honeygloom's avatar

No way! I’d love to hear the story!

I have a flash piece in the same vein. I wrote it after a guy came driving through our neighborhood one day with two freezers strapped in the back of his pickup. One freezer had FRESH painted on it, and the other had MEAT. He said he’d been killing off the neighborhood turkey flock and had more than he could eat. I’ll have to post it this weekend.

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erniet's avatar

Bone saw, meat grinder

Essential tools for killers

Also acid helps…

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Honeygloom's avatar

I feel like body disposal is what ends up tripping up most killers. You’ve got a good list here, I think you deserve the Helpful Horror Haiku award🥇

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erniet's avatar

Fun fact...Herbert Mullins was voted "Most Likely To Succeed" at my high school (although I was a baby then)....

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Honeygloom's avatar

The earthquake guy? Hey, he succeeded as far as he was concerned 😅

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erniet's avatar

When I was 9 and 10 was when both Muller and Edmund Kemper were active; I remember the adults always wanting to know where us kids were, especially the girls because of Kemper.

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Honeygloom's avatar

Yikes, I’ve heard stories from older women I knew when I lived in Utah about Bundy. And I guess being a single woman I’m always, careful, but I don’t think there’s ever been an active serial killer near me.

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erniet's avatar

This is true!😂

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erniet's avatar

I thank (or maybe blame?) society for this award...😁

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Honeygloom's avatar

Oh definitely blame 😂

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ClownWorld Shakespeare's avatar

Acid -- Are you talking about killing or a Dead show?

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erniet's avatar

Either...though Hydrochloric acid was what I was thinking...too many syllables though...

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erniet's avatar

What did the Dead Head say when the acid wore off?

"Man, this band sucks!" 😂

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ClownWorld Shakespeare's avatar

Hilarious! I have a sonnet about meat I'm gonna post later today. I wrote it a few months ago.

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Honeygloom's avatar

Definitely looking forward to this 😂

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ClownWorld Shakespeare's avatar

It's up.... I'll be back for some more haikus next week, I hope. Gotta recharge the batteries.....

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Honeygloom's avatar

Have a pleasant recharge!

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Wendy Melvin's avatar

Grind, grind, grind and stuff

A mystery meat surprise

Potlucks are so fun!

You can almost sing "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" to this one! 😆

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Honeygloom's avatar

Ha! You can! And now I have an idea for my next company potluck...

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Wendy Melvin's avatar

Season to taste and serve hot!☠️

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