1/27/18
August has been in the attic all day. He slept there last night, too. I drew the Seven of Pentacles for myself, but the thought of quiet reflection was nauseating, so I listened to Goatwhore and had tea.
1/28/18
“Good morning, August.” He stood in the doorway in maroon and gold silk pajamas and bed slippers. I’d never seen him like that before. It was charming, but his visage was grim “Everything, ok?”
“I’ve just been thinking.” He stopped and offered nothing more.
“Your card for today is the Six of Wands, victory.”
“But hollow victory.”
“Is it?” I watched him war with himself. Then he stepped forward and took my hand, caressing the palm with surprising warmth.
“It is.”
1/29/18
The Three of Swords reversed has sent August into a fit.
“It’s reversed August, that clearly means you should NOT worry,” I screamed as I flailed from my position on the ceiling. Hellbunny grunted something and August dropped me.
I didn’t die in the fall, I’m a little disappointed.
1/30/18
“Death won’t solve anything, quit complaining,” Willow scolded. She drew the Three of Wands for me and reminded me to keep my emotional distance from August. I hadn’t told her about the Daughter of Swords, but most likely she’d read it in my face. She and Mal had stopped by on their way back from to the Circus from parts unknown. She continued:
“Have you considered trying the dispersion spell again… and then again… and every time he comes back until he can’t get himself back together again?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
...Because things that seem futile probably are futile?